


Not a Plot, I Promise

by clique_sinnxr



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, M/M, Simon is confused, SnowBaz, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Is Gay for Simon Snow, baz in makeup, baz with nice hair, it's Christmas, or something, penny is one hundred percent done with simon, please enjoy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:40:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21958252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clique_sinnxr/pseuds/clique_sinnxr
Summary: Baz changes his look a little (aka hair and makeup) and Simon doesn't know how to act.
Relationships: Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow, Penelope Bunce & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 6
Kudos: 114





	1. the setup

**Simon:**

He’s definitely plotting something, he’s been in the washroom for far too long. I don’t know what he could be plotting, but he’s been trying to kill me since I came to Watford. Why would anything be different now?

**Baz:**

It’s not like I’m going out very much today. I don’t really have class for most of this week so I’m probably just going to practise violin and maybe come down occasionally for meals. Seeing as I have no absolute necessity to keep up the “scary-Baz” facade, I might be able to, for once, dress myself how I like.

I keep it fairly simple, a soft gray pullover and black skinny jeans, but instead of gelling my hair the way I usually do, I decide to just leave it down. I may or may not have spent twenty solid minutes squinting in the mirror, trying to get my eyeliner straight (unlike me), but no one really needs to know the truth. Right before I exit the bathroom, I carefully apply lip gloss on my mouth, making sure not to smudge it, then I walk out. 

Snow is too busy attempting to run his fingers through his tangled (golden) mop of hair to even notice me (notice me, please) so I walk out and go to breakfast.

As soon as I get to the table where I usually sit, Dev and Niall begin to look at me with unusual scrutiny. I begin to feel very self-conscious about my overall appearance.

“Much better this time.” he says before turning back to his cup of tea.

“I know,” I respond with a smirk, trying not to let a real smile come through, but probably failing miserably. As I get up to reach for the toast, Snow is walking into the dining hall. He and I make eye contact for half a second, less than half a second, before his mouth becomes a shocked oval and he turns away, hurrying to his friends (and his girlfriend). 

**Simon:**

Baz. He’s definitely plotting. The way he looks, the way he’s dressed, this has all got to be some kind of trick to distract me, then he’s going to swoop down like a vampire and end my life. Not that I would mind Baz swooping down on mーwhat? His plot’s already working, he’s muddling up my mind! I need to talk to Penny.

As soon as I approach the table she is sitting at, she gives me a reproachful look.

“What’s Baz up to now?” she asks tiredly.

“Have you seen him?” I hiss. “Look at him today! He’s trying to distract us all so he can feed on our dead bodies!”

“Ok,” Penny sighs, taking a rather large swig of black coffee from her mug, “or, now hear me out, he’s just trying something new. I didn’t realize there was a law that Baz had to dress like a vampire every day.”

“AHA!” I whisper-shout, and more than a few heads turn my direction. I continue in a quieter voice, “So you admit he dresses like a vampire, which means he is one!”

Penny rubs her hand over her temples and looks at me with great exasperation. “Just let him be,” she says appeasingly. “Look at him, he’s not looking at anyone, he’s not trying anything. It must be hard for him to be so unusually open even without you making things more difficult.”

Open about what? He’s trying to kill me! There’s nothing he’s really being open about except his desire to do me in! Not that I’d mind if he diーthere it is again! He’s messing with my mind! 

“Open about what?” I ask Penny.

“His sexuality of course.”


	2. success

**Simon:**

His what? There’s nothing to be open about! He’s in love with my ex-girlfriend and it’s his fault we broke up! Every single thing he does is a plot to mess me up and he’s plenty open about that! I wish he would just make his move already on Agatha, but he’s insistent on keeping me anxious. It’s all a plot. 

I see him getting up from his table, quickly running his hand through his hair to keep it from falling in his face. I wonder what his hair would feel like. I imagine running my own hands through his hair, pulling and twisting on the ends, bringing my hand to rest on his faーthere it is again! I look up at his eyes, hiding the rest of my face with my cup of tea so as to remain inconspicuous. They are more piercing than usual, more like molten silver, more captivating, hypnotic. Before leaving the table, he takes one last (sophisticated) sip of tea. He sets the cup down and licks his lips slowly. I find my eyes tracing every motion of his tongue. Penny slaps the side of my head with her newspaper. I turn to her and she rolls her eyes.

“You need to figure yourself out, Simon,” she says drily, then shakes out her newspaper and begins to read.

**Baz:**

Snow is staring at me. Again. As I walk out of the dining hall, I feel his eyes follow my every movement, so I take my time and enjoy the only time he will look at me with anything other than fear or hatred.

**Simon:**

When I finally get back to my room after spending most of the day with Penny, I flop down on my bed. Baz makes a noise of disgust, a look of disdain on his face. I want to kiss the sneer off his face. Immediately I am reminded of what Penny was telling me earlier. I really do need to figure myself out. Every time I look at Baz now I can’t control my thoughts. 

“Baz,” I start tentatively. I don’t know why I’m asking him of all people, or why I think he will help, he of all people. “What does it mean if a bloke wants to kiss another bloke?” 

**Baz:**

Christ. The day I expect to be completely free of emotional baggage is the day Snow decides to have a sexuality crisis. All the same, I can’t reject him or refuse to answer his questionーthese things require at least a basic level of decency.

“Well,” I start, preparing myself to be as vague as possible, “is it just kissing or something more?” I cringe as soon as the words leave my mouth. I wonder who it is. Probably no one from Watford, I don’t think. If only it were me. 

He hesitates. And starts. And hesitates again. I make my voice gentler. “Simon?”

“More.” I barely hear the word come out of his mouth.

“Well, Snow, I think you might like this bloke.”

“Who said anything about me?” He tries to argue, but I arch my brow at him and he acquiesces. “Okay, then what should I do?” he has sat up now, and is looking more directly at me than he’s ever done.

“Tell him how you feel.” I cannot believe I am giving Snow advice on how to get with someone who isn’t me.

“Is that what you would do?” he asks.

“Crowley, no. I’m much too much of a coward to tell the guy I like.” Immediately I want to slap my hand over my mouth. Great, and now he knows. His eyes widen momentarily and he pauses, as if thinking. I close my eyes and let my head drop down. I only open them when I feel a soft touch on my shoulder.

“Baz, it’s you.” And I feel as if the entire weight of the world has been lifted off of my shoulders.

“Snowー” I begin.

“Simon.” he says. “You called me Simon before.” And I surge forward to meet his lips, to kiss the stupid smile off his face. And he kisses me back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I hope you enjoyed.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you are enjoying this.   
> If you want to chat or whatever or send me recommendations dm or follow me on instagram @prithium and also subscribe to my youtube channel:  
> youtube.com/channel/UCRjUWWyU2060VYi-0e86O7Q?view_as=subscriber   
> ok cool bye.


End file.
